Monday, November 9, 2009

Singing for whom?

I was at the clinic this morning to get some medication and the Oprah's show was being screened on the TV. It featured a plain looking girl making it to fame with her singing. She performed 'My Heart Will Go On' and the nurse there exclaimed to me, "She's really good hor?" I merely gave her a weak smile as I couldn't possibly tell her exactly what I was thinking at that moment.

I felt that I could have done a better rendition of the song.

People who have heard me sing would know that I'm not boasting when I say that. I've taken part in talent shows in the past and I've performed before audiences numbered thousands too. But what comes after all that momentary fame and glory? It's simply emptiness.

There is a great difference in my singing between before and after I know Christ. Ever since I started singing for God and God alone 12 years ago, I sound the most beautiful. No more anxiety; no more hiccups; I simply lose myself. What can be more fulfilling than singing for the King of Kings and Lord of Lords? I'm liberated from the chains of self-consciousness. Instead of the gaping uncertainty I used to experience, my heart is filled with joy and thanksgiving for my God Almighty. Even though other's opinions of my singing don't matter anymore, I have had many in the congregation who came to tell me that I'd ministered to them. That is better reward than people praising me for my voice alone. It is the greatest privilege for me that others see God Himself in my voice.

Even though now, due to my life-stage, the only ones who hear me sing are my children and God but they are worthy enough audience. After all, God is the One who gave me the voice and I want my children to know God from my singing.

I'm not interested in the Singapore Idol or America Got Talent which lasts only for a season. I'm only interested in eternity.

Psalm 71:22-23
"I will praise you with the harp for your faithfulness, O my God; I will sing praise to you with the lyre, O Holy One of Israel. My lips will shout for joy when I sing praise to you— I, whom you have redeemed."

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