Being Well-intentioned

I have been wanting to post about this for a long time but I've restrained myself since I've always wanted to forgive and forget. However, what happened yesterday had been rather traumatising for my children and so I really want to voice out my frustrations about people who have good intentions but are going about the WRONG way in "helping" me. 

I really do appreciate kind passers-by who give up their seats for my kids while on public transport or give way to me so that I can get on and off trains or buses quickly. Some even help me carry my things so that I can focus on caring for my children. That's what I call helping with brains.

However, what I don't need are people who forcibly TEAR my children away from my side thinking that they are doing me a favor despite my kids crying out of fear. How can a child not be screaming when a total stranger carry him/her without permission? In the name of helping me, they bribe my kids with sweets and junk food which I then had to tell them not to eat and appear to be the bad guy and deal with the ensuing tantrum. It is also not helpful when strangers make snide remarks and give useless suggestions, assuming that I'm not able to cope just because I have 4 young children with me. I actually have been doing very well on my own without their "help", thank you very much.

What I DO need is people to simply get out of the way and not crowd around us. At least, they should ask me before trying to help and not insist on doing it their way which mostly makes things more difficult for me.

Most of all, I beseech people to think before they act presumptuously. Sometimes, what others do just don't make sense. While I was pregnant and having fainting spells, I had people who would shove a cup of hot milo into my hands, when I was just recovering from my dizziness, despite my protests. They seemed to think that it would magically cure me of my ailment. In the end, I had very often spilled the steaming contents onto myself or dirtied the floor as my hands were trembling from the ordeal. I ever scalded myself in the process. How was that helpful?

I try to look on the bright side and think that Singapore is becoming a more gracious society with people less apathetic and more willing to help those in need. Yet, I can't help but think that some people are simply plain nosy and just want to feel good about themselves. They only make things worse. Have they ever thought that their bulldozing methods are not entirely appreciated?

I think I'm going to continue to meet both helpful and not so helpful people since there is no way I can avoid bringing 4 kids and taking public tranport all by myself. That is unless, someone blesses me with a car or sponsors us a monthly cab allowance.